Dark were the eyes of the man who baked,
\nAs he realised that Mr Kipling’s cakes were faked.
\nA pain of knowledge that rodents were used
\nLeft him angry knowing that they had been abused.
\nThey swam around in scented batter,
\nAll the while growing fatter and fatter,
\nA mouse, a rat, to them it didn’t matter
\nAs they were drinking tea with Alice and the Mad Hatter.<\/p>\n
So the man broke in to get some justice,
\nSwinging from a rope he had tied to\u00a0the buttress,
\nSpoon in hand, passions aflame,
\nTo rescue the\u00a0captives before they all\u00a0went lame.
\nHe tore through the building, opened every cage,
\nThinking of the story that would be on the front page.
\nWhen the sun came up just behind Fenner’s Hill
\nHe sat back to watch them scurry off to the nearest landfill,
\nThough the legal action against him would be severe
\nAnd could possibly mean the end of his glorious conveyancing career.<\/p>\n
(Words by S. Black and I. McIver)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Dark were the eyes of the man who baked, As he realised that Mr Kipling’s cakes were faked. A pain of knowledge that rodents were used Left him angry knowing that they had been abused. They swam around in scented batter, All the while growing fatter and fatter, A mouse, a rat, to them it […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1452","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-god-damn-poetry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1452","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1452"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1452\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1453,"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1452\/revisions\/1453"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1452"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1452"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1452"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}