Good evening, I’m Splash Gordon and welcome to the First Annual Duck-Stacking Extravaganza. We’re here in the beautiful city of Keighley with seven competators who are destined for glory. I won’t bother to mention all of their names as the games are about to begin but just for some cheap laughs there’s a man called Hudie Doody and a lady with celotape over her shoes who goes by the name of Royal Tw*t.<\/p>\n
Oh and we’ve started, off they go. Each person has picked up their first duck and… they’re finding it very hard to place them on top of the second. The seconds, burp, pardon me, the seconds have actually done a runner. They’re refusing to stay in one place and let these people put another of their species on their head. I think that’s a little hypacritical don’t you think, Jim?<\/p>\n
“Absolutely”<\/p>\n
Just what I was thinking. They’re bringing on additional staff to help with the stacking of the ducks however there’s not enough to round and… yes, they’re asking the three people who have come to watch this momentous event to assist. Three minutes have passed and nobody has gotten past one duck. OH WAIT… no, another let down. Speaking of let down did I tell you about my recent surgery, Jim?<\/p>\n
“Unfortunately yes.”<\/p>\n
Well let’s go over it again to make sure everyone at home knows too. It started with this huge clump of hair just… *end transmission*<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Good evening, I’m Splash Gordon and welcome to the First Annual Duck-Stacking Extravaganza. We’re here in the beautiful city of Keighley with seven competators who are destined for glory. I won’t bother to mention all of their names as the games are about to begin but just for some cheap laughs there’s a man called […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-519","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-ian"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/519","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=519"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/519\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=519"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=519"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pouringbeans.com\/archive\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=519"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}