What was that? It was a bad idea to begin with and now you’re going to run it into the ground like you always do? You clearly know me so well.
Hi, I’m Ian, I recently turned 37 and I still retain the intelligence of someone a quarter of my age. I used to take song lyrics, change them into something else and then hand them to my friend to upload onto our website because that was “funny” even though most of the time it really wasn’t.
Do you remember ‘Slut Call Girl’, a “hilarious” reinterpretation of Billy Joel’s ‘Uptown Girl’? Probably not. It was one of my better efforts. The others are better best forgotten.
In the spirit of this though I have decided to drag all of my showbiz mates out to record a covers album to end 2020 the way it began; awfully. It’s even worse, it’s a funny covers album. I will be taking some of the moved beloved rock songs from the last 30-40 years by one of the most amazing bands from within our very own lifetime and I will be turning them into a one joke joke about curling one off.
(I can hear you groaning already)
Let’s take a look at the track listing:
Everybody Poos
The One I Shove
Shiny Happy Faeces
Nightshitting
It’s The End of The Roll As We Know It (and I Feel Fine)
The Sidewinder Shits Tonight
Strained Currencies
What’s The Excretion, Kenneth?
The Great Pee-Pond
Imitation of Shite
I feel as though I may have crossed a line that I can never recover from; please forgive me Buck, Berry, Mills and Stipe.
13 comments on “REM Covers Album”
This is a terrible shame, and I think you know that.
It is but I am strangely proud of ‘Strained Currencies’, it could have equally been ‘Stained Currencies’ for maximum comedic effect. It’s all the more bittersweet because ‘Strange Currencies’ is one of my favourite REM songs.
I genuinely hope it never gets recorded (or at the very least gets stored in a warehouse next to a load of your books if it does) but reading that list made me do childish giggles. Bravo sir.
I’d like to suggest adding in “Orange Mush”.
That is going straight in on the first half because 1) it’s a brilliant song and 2) that’s the badger’s nadgers (like “bee’s knees” but dirtier and slightly better).
It is a brilliant song. I’d argue it’s the badger’s nadgers even without rewriting its lyrics to make crass jokes about poo.
Indeed. It will make everyone warm and fuzzy inside when they get a load of my “Orange Mush”.
(waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!)
What?
Wheeeeeeeeeeey!
(What?)
I’ve been trying to make a poo pun out of “Stand” but I’ve given up.
Other than ‘Sit’ but that’s not really a poo pun, it’s what you do when you poo. It did make me giggle in a way of “I know that’s shit but for some reason I’m going to laugh anyway”.
If only the song’s name was “Sit” already, you could do a brilliant pun by calling it “Shit”. It’s a real shame. REM massively dropped the ball on that one.
You mean like ‘Sit Down’ by James? Turn it into ‘Shit Down’? Yeah, thanks REM, completely ruined everything for me yet again. Thanks Michael Stipe for NOTHING.
Michael Stipe? More like Michael Shite.
That’s a killer zing right there.