Chris Industries International Ltd.
Welcome to our corporate website. Chris Industries International Ltd. is a new multinational conglomerate owned and operated by the world-renowned business mogul, billionaire and entrepreneur Chris.
About the company
CII Ltd. was formed in March 2007 when Chris started a new job with lots of free time in the shift pattern and wanted something to do with his day. He decided to set up a business, and using a small portion of his personal fortune, spent £42bn acquiring 35% of Europe’s companies. The result was Chris Industries International Ltd. With the first month’s profits, Chris was able to purchase Belgium, which is now the world’s largest corporate headquarters.
Business interests
As the world’s largest company, CII has a broad and varied portfolio of business interests. They include:
Contracting, business negotiations, administration services, outsourcing, insourcing, brownsaucing, ceramics, sportswear manufacture, fruit wholesaling, punching the holes in Polos, dog grooming, private dental care, fridge components, long-distance helicopter travel, private bicycle couriering, cinema cleaning, wires, legs, pencils, toast, donkey calming, roosters, boiled tinned meats, cow milking, railway engineering, bridge demolition, treehouse architecture, paper cup calibration, post-consumer seat mutilation, and many others.
All of CII’s varied businesses are split into five simple and logical divisions, named Special Services, Miscellaneous Contracting Services, Business Strategy Services, Pet Care and Spearmint.
Corporate headquarters
CII is now based in Belgium. As of March 10 2007, all of the people and things within Belgium became known as Belgium Ltd., and this in turn became a wholly owned subsidiary of CII Ltd’s Pet Care division. All Belgians will begin new roles producing chew toys and dog biscuits in a phased operation beginning in April 2007.
Chris refuses to go anywhere near Belgium himself, but is overseeing the construction of CII’s new headquarters from his London penthouse. The new complex will house all CII’s administrative facilities, as well as a warehouse for storage of new cat scratching posts, and work started on 12 March 2007 with the demolition of Brussels to make way for the new building.
Corporate website
In an inspired move, which proves beyond doubt the money-saving tactics that have allowed Chris to achieve all that he has in his short but brilliant career, CII Ltd did not waste money on building a new website, and has instead commandeered an existing website to use as its own. PouringBeans.com is now the online home of CII, and over the coming weeks, months and years will be the place to look for new product launches, job vacancies, and other press notices.
Chris Industries International Ltd.
Making the World Better for ChrisTM