I am also a subsiduary of Me
I lack content! Fill me fill me! 😛 If you say so little bean!
An Audience with the Queen of Hearts – An Imaginary Play by Jerry Loinsford
**Imagine if you will, it’s the courtroom setting from Alice in Wonderland but after Alice runs off they decide, hey, let’s try some other people. So they do. The Queen stands angrily on her throne**
Queen: Bring out the heathens!
**A card sentry comes along and is pushing Tom and Jerry along with a pointy stick – made of metal**
Queen: What is their crime?
King: They were asked the time and refused to answer.
**By the way, most of this is supposed to rhyme, unless I’m being clever or can’t think of a decent word. It’s a gimic I know**
Queen: Are you sure?
King: Positively, as sure as I can see.
Queen: What do you have to say to explain your behaviour on this day?
**Tom and Jerry being Tom and Jerry are finding it hard to express themselves without the use of huge mallets and roast hams**
Tom: *Shrugs*
Jerry: *Shrugs back*
Queen: Will you not even answer the Queen? *shocked*
**The Jury start mumbling in the background**
Owl: Whatever does it mean?
Pelican: Certain death I would imagine, just give her a sec.
**They’re both on the jury by the way**
King: Wait a min! Perhaps they have no tongues to speak of.
**Great pun there King, plus you know the little guy likes to try and be the voice of reason**
Sentry: That can’t be true, they must have tongues, it flashes when they cough.
Tom: *Points at his tongue*
Jerry: *Closes his mouth and points at Tom*
Tom: *Realises what he’s done, quickly hides his and points at Jerry*
King: I feel as though we’re marooned on a battleship, sinking.ÂÂ
**Jury mumbles again**
Owl: The Queen is now thinking of the best way to remove the heathens who insist on being rude.
Queen: Just to ensure they are quite dead, and not in that feeble way cartoons do, poke out their eyes and slice their heads, cut them through and through and through.
**Crowd roars, as do the jury, noone is sane here**
King: My dear, will you not reconsider? They only wish to please
Queen: They spend all day fighting and chasing and making traps out of rope and cheese. I’m afraid it’s over, drag them away to the pit, inflict great suffering and pain.
**The card guards drag them off in merriment**
King: Ah well, it can’t be helped. Who’s next to take the blame?
The End