Are you bored of walking home from work the same way? Sick of seeing the same sights as you trudge to your girlfriend’s house? Have you had enough of using your eyes and witnessing a monotonous, predictable series of events every day of your life but can’t afford a holiday to sweeten the deal?
Then we have the product for you.
Gaffer Tape Adventures is the newest of the new. All it takes is a simple idea; covering your eyes, and possibly your ugly mug, with gaffer tape. Now the whole world is a brand new place.
No longer do you face boredom as you leave the office. No longer do you tire of the familiarity of the way to your significant other. You see nothing; every day is a new challenge as you shuffle slowly down the street, attempting to avoid hitting people and falling over objects. Each road is a potential death trap. Each moment could be your last.
Our impressive kit can start you out on the road to adventure. We will provide you with everything you need to get started with your own Gaffer Tape Adventure. Our easy ONE – TWO – THREE step program will get your up and away within minutes.
You will be awash with fear and excitement. Not only can you bite the bullet big time but you can also look forward to these other thrilling activities:
* Muggings
* Stabbings
* Groping
* Wedgies
* Nuggies
* Unexpected Conga Lines
We can guarantee you the time of your life as soon as you put your life in the hands of Gaffer Tape Adventures.
£49.99 from your nearest aviary.
8 comments on “Gaffer Tape Adventures”
This sounds great! Anything that could entangle me in an unexpected conga line at any moment gets my interest.
Do you have any special offers on?
I have a special offer on a badger and I have a special offer on a pile of coconuts. Take your pick.
I was hoping for something that might suit my limited budget. I was looking to spend about £10.10.
You could personally hire one of our “Bwa” Minions. They will only be able to cover your eyes whilst sitting on your shoulders, and for a period of around sixty minutes. If you ask them anything, however, they can only respond by saying, “Bwa!”
How does that sound?
Well, it sounds like a minion saying “Bwa!”, obviously.
How much are they? Do I get ten of them?
You only get one for £10.10. You can’t expect ten for £10.10; since the European market closed there’s less of an abundance than usual.
That’s a pretty shoddingtons offer. I’m not sure about that. I expect ten when I pay £10.10. I’ll have to think about it.
I thought about it and I don’t want it.
Your thoughts are a hindrance to your life. Your chances of minions are less than four per cent now.
Woe betide you.