I am Bruntingthorpe, that has previously been proven (see http://pouringbeans.com/i-am-bruntingthorpe/)
Now, given the choice, Chris has decided that he is Middlesbrough. Recent aerial photography can confirm this:
His cheery, cheeky face can now be seen by anyone flying over the Tyne Tees area. It is sure to bring more tourists up to this part of the world than the Sunderland Airshow and the Wetwang Scarecrow Festival combined.
Now it only remains for Kev to decide what part of the United Kingdom he will turn into.
14 comments on “Chris is Middlesbrough”
Is that an aerial photograph? Bloody hell, the countryside surrounding Middlesbrough, on what appears to be an island, is just a bleak, featureless wasteland, isn’t it?
Yes. Have you ever been to Teesside? No matter what era, day, time or season it is always and I do mean ALWAYS like this.
I’ve driven through it. Does that count? It was awful.
If you have to, drive through it. Never get out though. Don’t breathe the air, don’t look anyone in the eye, don’t touch the food and certainly don’t go window shopping. It’ll all end in tears.
I’ve got all the windows I need so next time my car takes me to Middlesbrough I’ll put my foot down and just get the damn hell through it.
Too right. Even if there’s a couple of roads that you’re dying to paint, or whatever it is you do on your website, you’ll have to leave them be. They’re not worth it, mate. For your own safety (I wrote, “stafety” which I think is a better word) stay well away.
If I can’t paint them, can I at least sketch them? Just a little impressionistic miniature in charcoal maybe?
Oh go on then but make sure you’re using a high powered telescope from a very safe distance.
If you’re really struggling you could always do a drive-by sketching. Someone takes the wheel, drives through Middlesbrough at 100mph and you have to scribble as fast as you can.
That’s a last resort though…
I like the sound of that. A bez through the Boro with my Crayolas out.
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!
(what?)
That kind of behaviour is bound to garnish the attention of the police, boy.
Garnish it? What, like, put a spring of parsley on the attention of the police?
Yes. If you really want them to notice you have to go the extra mile. That way they’ll saunter past all the ungarnished behaviour.
I… the…
Yeah.