Words are the foundation of our language, the tools of our communication. As well as being useful to us, they can also be beautiful: the sounds they make and the feelings they evoke are all a fundamental part of the experience of human interaction.
Not all words are like this. Some words are stupid. Like this one.
Tinsel
I like Christmas. I like it an awful lot. I like presents and Christmas dinner and having a tree in the house. Given the warm, pleasant weather we’ve been having lately, with the sun high in the sky and the gentle breeze just keeping it cool enough to go out and enjoy yourself (or, conversely, to stay in and suffer sun guilt), my thoughts have naturally been turning to Christmas lately, and all these things I like about it.
I even like the shiny spangly ropes of gaudy plastic frill that get draped everywhere. I just hate their name. Tinsel. Written down it’s fine, but said out loud it has an unfortunate pairing of a T and an S that give the whole word the irritating sound of someone whispering nearby, or possibly a high-pitched whistling noise made by air escaping from a perished rubber seal on the back of an old fridge. For example. That’s not Christmassy at all. That’s just stupid. And that’s why we need to rename this delightful substance to something better. My suggestion is “spanglestrands”, a word that describes the article in question without making me want to scratch my ears. Perfect.
18 comments on “Words I Hate, Part 4”
I never really had a problem with the word, the shiny spangly ropes of gaudy plastic frill, on the other hand, get right on my tits. Dropping their shiny spangly bits of gaudy plastic frill all over the house, looking all shiny & spangly & gaudy, being ropes of plastic frill. The list is endless.
Urgh.
Chris hates the word. Kevin hates the item. What should we do? If you agree with Chris, press the green button. If you agree with Kevin, press the red button.
What happens to people who hate both? And what’s your view?
Suddenly there’s more questions than answers.
How could any human being hate both the word and the thing? That’s just not on. I stand for not hating either, because I haven’t really thought about it that much. If I had to choose I would go for the word because tinsel feels nice on your face at Christmas.
This is the closest we’ve ever come to Newsnight, or Question Time.
It IS isn’t it?
It IS, isn’t it?
It IS, though, isn’t it?
It IS, isn’t it?
It certainly IS, isn’t it?
It IS. Isn’t it?
It IS though, isn’t it?
I think it IS, isn’t it?
I’ve considered it again and it IS, isn’t it?
It DEFINITELY is ISN’T it?
I’m certain that it IS and it IS, isn’t it?
Yes
Thank god for that.
It always and I mean always ends far too soon if you ask me.