February is Scary

February 1st, 2011

I haven’t done much recently. I’ve been sat around looking fat, being fat and seeing fat. I heard fat a few times too. What I need is a project to occupy my time and due to the absence of money, funds and general wealth I will unfortunately be forced to improvise. I did consider a few things, and I forgot them and then I got worried.

There are a number of professions in the world that either are dying out for lack of interest or get the piss taken out of them because they’re dull and stuck in the past. I wouldn’t mind one of these jobs because I’m sure I wasn’t made for sitting in an office all day every day (at least I think that’s the case). I would happily make barrels or sweep the floors or do little dances for pennies. What are these missing though? Yes, that’s right; a bit of sex.

I could organise some sexy girls and then visit places to advertise these amazing jobs with the aid of tantalising visuals and seductive imagery. Everything looks better with my face next to it. FACT.

So I’m pulling on my least-smelly clothes and doing a tour, although now it occurs to me that in order to get the sexy girls to advertise the jobs I will need to recruit the sexy girls which will in turn need its own campaign to get them. But how do you recruit sexy girls? More sexy girls? And how do I recruit those sexy girls? Carrots on string?

I think I’m gonna have to sit down and do some numbers.

Entry Filed under: Ian,Think about it