Silly Bint of the Month – Amy Winehouse
January 23rd, 2008
Oh yeah, I’ve been working up to this one *cracks his knuckles* for what seems like ages. I don’t really even need to touch on any sort of fact because deep down there has always been a strong hatred towards her in my loins. My loins remember the days when she was pretty unknown and was striving to sell any records and then all of a sudden that f*cking awful ‘Rehab’ song and bam, suddenly she’s everyone’s favourite British female singer. I don’t see what the appeal is especially when she seems to have taken on the trend of Pete Docherty and whilst letting her health slip is disappointing fans by not turning up for gigs. She’s not a very good role model considering she’s been arrested for possession of drugs and if she’s not in the newspapers for changing her hair colour it’s for more things to do with drugs or some sort of feud.
I’m sure she’s a lovely girl but quite frankly (pardon the joke there, unintended) she should disappear somewhere for a while, let everything calm down and come back. The cynic in me though says to drive her off the cliff in the same bus as James Morrison, Mika and Paolo Nutini.
Entry Filed under: Loins,Silly Bint of the Month
22 Comments
1. katie | January 23rd, 2008 at 15:16
other passengers on the death bus:
David Gray, Tom Baxter, Daniel Powter, ABBA, Amy McDonald, and Mika again just cos I hate him.
2. katie | January 23rd, 2008 at 15:22
Oh, and Madonna, who I think is a prime candidate for future SBOTM if she hasn’t been so already.
3. Kevil | January 23rd, 2008 at 16:33
I think we should make it a day trip for the house of Kevin Spacey
4. Ian Mac Mac Mac Mac McIver | January 23rd, 2008 at 16:59
Great idea! We’ll load them all up on a nice coach with a toilet and a packed lunch then launch them off, no wait Garforth cliff doesn’t have a sharp drop… erm, White Cliffs of Dover maybe?
5. katie | January 23rd, 2008 at 17:05
don’t give them food, that only gives them strength to survive the fall! you might as well hand out parachutes as they’re boarding! give them.. cheese strings.. no nutrition whatsoever 🙂
6. Chris | January 23rd, 2008 at 23:36
To return to our original topic of Amy Winehouse, I too remember when she was just some bint with a decent voice who sang songs nobody had heard of. She had one that went “you should be stronger than me” that was quite nice.
Now she’s famous and oh, she has so many problems and life is so hard. Well, now you’ve got your fame, if all you want to do with it is get smacked up and whine about your jobless layabout husband, you can piss off where you came from, or failing that, take a hike on the sea bed with some concrete boots on.
Back to Black? More like Stack of Cack.
7. Ian Mac Mac Mac Mac McIver | January 24th, 2008 at 08:56
Here here! 🙂
(maybe you should have written this then, I obviously wasn’t full of enough bile when I did it)
8. Kevil | January 25th, 2008 at 10:39
Plus, she’s friends with the ultimate-scumbag; Mr Doherty.
Damnation enough.
9. Ian Mac Mac Mac Mac McIver | January 25th, 2008 at 11:51
Exactly, you don’t need a weather man to know which way the wind blows.
10. Chris | January 26th, 2008 at 01:11
No, you can do that thing where you lick your finger and hold it up for a bit. That’s a good way to tell.
11. Ian Mac Mac Mac Mac McIver | January 27th, 2008 at 20:59
Oh yeah, right, erm, of course I do that too
*puts his weather-reading machine under his coat and leaves the room.*
12. Chris | January 29th, 2008 at 09:13
Think you might have wasted your pennies there, me old mucker. You can also look out of the window to see if it’s raining.
13. Ian Mac Mac Mac Mac McIver | January 29th, 2008 at 12:03
Window? What manner of witchcraft is this? Are you talking about the spaces in buildings where the outside world lives?
14. Chris | January 30th, 2008 at 11:33
Windows are but the beginning. One day, my son, you will learn the hidden secrets of the “dore”, and then ye shall know all.
15. Ian Mac Mac Mac Mac McIver | January 30th, 2008 at 11:56
This dore ye speaks of, could it be that which separates two things from themselves? My counsin once spoke of this long ago before the great darkness fell.
16. Chris | January 30th, 2008 at 17:23
Your counsin is a wyse man. The dore be that of which ye speak, its power be immense and harnessed only by the few.
Meddle not with its powers or it will shut on your fingers for all eternity.
17. Kevil | January 30th, 2008 at 18:30
If the other syde of the dore ye seek, first you must lern the ways of the outside world folk. Some say they walk freely in greene places called parks, and have no fear of the moving autocar; a carriage with no horses to draw it.
18. Ian Mac Mac Mac Mac McIver | January 31st, 2008 at 09:04
Begast! I never knew such things existed outside the shire. Believe me when I reach the tender age of fourteen, as with all the boys in my village, I shall have to leave to fend for myself. Perhaps then I will encounter the dore then.
I hope these wyrld folk ye speaks of will take kindly to peoples such as myself.
19. Chris | January 31st, 2008 at 20:14
If walk ye in this mystick world, take with you some of the sacred coynes. They have much worth to the strange creatures beyond the dore. You might exchange them there for certain goods, or services, or rights of passage. Should food ye seek, coynes will be the only way to get it.
The ritual associated with this, called the shorp, is complex and must be learned before ye step beyond the dore. Find the goods ye need, proffer a number of coynes, and ask ye for a rissitte. No good shall come of those who no record have of their purchases.
20. Ian Mac Mac Mac Mac McIver | February 3rd, 2008 at 20:35
I once found a rissitte on the floor by the nearest Oldie. It contained words never spoken of in the Shire. I took it home to the family and had Uncle Merrick translate it for me, something to do with loofes of brud and jaars of peckles.
Then it was cast into the fire and dark demons spread forth.
21. Chris | February 4th, 2008 at 12:32
I’m bored of this now. I think it’s run its course.
22. Ian Mac Mac Mac Mac McIver | February 4th, 2008 at 13:46
Yeah. Time to w*e on it and run away.