“All in all, the plant is one of the largest and most prosperous in the area, and, though situated outside of the main perimeter of production plants on the south end of town, is nevertheless a distinguishing hallmark of the community, to the eternal chagrin of most locals.”
(Extract from ‘Lord of the Barnyard’ by Tristan Egolf)
7 comments November 25th, 2009
Having successfully re-introduced the word ‘loins’, the yo-yo and the finger waggle into the 21st century I am now on the lookout for further relics from the past to lighten up, brush over with some foundation and stick them in a public viewing box for 80p a pop.
Let’s get together a focus group and get some ideas brewing. Come on, chop chop!
9 comments October 27th, 2009
As it happens, and with December looming out of the woodwork, I really need to get my arse in gear with the Christmas Gangster Rap album. I’ve got some rhymes down here and there but at the moment it’s a page with some song titles dotted across:
Possible Song Titles
Pimp That Tree
Check Tha Cold / Check Tha Snow
Cold Piece of Coal, Peace To Tha Soul
Meal for Three: You, Her and Me
Brave Tha Sales
Shopping Like a Mother F*cker
Crackers and B*tches
Cook That Bird!
No Christmas for Me (I W*nked in my Stocking) – instrumental
It’s really, really, really hard being an inspirational music writer / producer / maestro you know.
14 comments October 13th, 2009
The following documents are the minutes of a top secret meeting and should be treated as such.
(Me and Ian are secret agents right?)
Continue Reading 11 comments September 24th, 2009
Suck deep and bathe…
Newsboost from Pouring Beans on Vimeo.
13 comments September 16th, 2009
As it happens, before any of us have realised, we are hurtling towards Christmas on a broken truck with three wheels, two gears and a wing mirror covered in toffee. Did you like that? You can sing it if you want to.
In order to really get into the spirit I have devised a new concept that can neatly fit into most of the ideas I come up with as well as sparking up a few imaginative pennies along the way. I am currently in the process of writing a Gangster Christmas Album and was wondering if you would like to contribute. Obviously beneath the violence, the swearing, the carnage and the chaos there will be heartfelt tales of shopping and families as that’s what Christmas is all about, right?
I’m pulling in a few guest collaborators to help with the music but any song lyrics, titles, ideas or anything like that would be gratefully acknowledged. You can also help with the tunes too. There are no boundaries when it comes to Festive Hip Hop.
13 comments September 14th, 2009
I have recently been informed that two astonishing new phrases have been immediately made up for the consumption of da beans website. They come aficionado and long-time sponsor Keveel De Heel, currently showing his work around the Northern shores of Italy.
Unfortunately due to his busy work schedule Mr De Heel didn’t have time to tell us what they meant so it has been thrown open to da beans community to establish their meanings. They are as follows:
Sponge Hammer
Cleaning out the fish bowl
Pet away! Pet away!
10 comments July 20th, 2009
Woo, guess who’s back…. Thats right, WE ARE!
Continue Reading 10 comments June 12th, 2009
Just so you all know, I am still here, I’m just lacking umpf lately.
If anyone knows wehre I can aquire some, that would be most handy….
15 comments May 11th, 2009
What order should a cutlery drawer be in? Personally I think it should be knives, forks, big spoons and teaspoons across the front. Sarah and my sister think Im wrong, but couldnt offer consistant reasons.
I need more opinions! Perferably enough to put me in the majority.
15 comments February 10th, 2009