Newsboost Zoom Flume – World Under Pressure

May 12th, 2010

Increasing pressure has today been inflicted upon the world by a large group of Americans obsessed with the motion picture ‘Back To The Future II’. They are stating that, with less than five years before we reach the year 2015, they are very disappointed with the lack of progress in the fields of science that were implied in the film.

“It’s awful,” says hasbeen wunderkinder Lars Inuit who is the spokesperson for the group Get Back To The Future, “We’ve no hover cars, no hover boards. Last week I went into a diner and there wasn’t a monitor with Ronald Regan on it telling me what the day’s specials were. I don’t really think there is enough time for the technology to reach this level anymore. What are we supposed to do?”

With not really having anyone from the world to speak on behalf of the world the United Nations decided to balance a donkey on a beachball for seven minutes as a direct response to the claims from the group. When the donkey only managed thirty seconds it was rushed away into a back room and replaced with a cardboard cut out.

We asked Kevin Hill Science Master, leader in the field of tasting his own mouth, about the news. “I’ve seen the film but it’s never had an effect on me. I mean what’s the point in finding out what is happening in a few years time when we’ve only just reached the point where we can taste our own mouths? We need to focus and stick to the basics.”

A similar group appeared towards the end of the twentieth century when fans on the cult television series ‘Space 1999’ were appauled that the citizens of planet earth were not living on the moon and travelling around in shoddy trains.

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