Archive for June, 2006
Mr. Cockall interviews tomorrows geniuses (using song)
Who are you?Â
Susan Winkerplott
What’s the Idea?
I’ve developed a simple and effective way of having a drink. Simpler than turning on the tap! My idea is the soon-to-be multi-award winning Dehydrated Water.
What is it?
It’s summer refreshment in a bag. It’s lovliness in a foil package. It’s the future of drinks, snacks, the whole caboodle.
What does it do?
On a hot day you need to keep full of fluids, but not so much that when you jump up and down you hear that weird watery sound in your stomach. All you have to do is open the sachet, pour out the contents into a glass and add water. Hey presto, instant water! At the drop of a hat. Right there in front of you. It’s unbelievable.
So what are you gonna do about it?
Nothing (!) Mr. Cockall, it’s all in my head >:)
June 14th, 2006
Here I am, sitting in my living room for the last time ever. Just waiting to be picked up. My room is empty. My stuff is all in boxes. I will never enter this house again and might never see Warrington again (though actually that bit’s quite a nice thought). It took six hours to empty my room, pack and clean up.
And then I get home and I will have nowhere to put all this. No idea what to do with it all. I have two of everything.
And then I need a career. Today is a very strange day. 🙁
June 13th, 2006
As you can see this is definately not a good match, Wig maybe upset but she is one scary worm! I think Wiggly was conned into going on this “dinner date”, it’s a wonder he came back in one piece.
June 13th, 2006
Look at this:
 
This is the bizarre sight that you get when you come out of my office building. To me, it looks like a giant upside-down rock raspberry. I think it’s keeping all the annoying clients who have filed complaints underneath in some sort of pre-historic world where dinosaurs roam. Like that bit in Tomb Raider… before you realised it was shit.
June 12th, 2006
After several attempts to coax Wiggly out of his resting place he agreed to a small photoshoot in the hope of finding a mate. Now I have heard a worm lives at the bottom of Ians garden and was hoping Wiggly could meet him/her (he’s not fussy). Please reply with any ads.
Â
June 12th, 2006
I groom lovely Poodles,
I groom them all day long,
And when I get really bored,
I groom them in a thong.
Shampoo in the morning
A trim in the by the light of the moon,
But never groom a poodle dear,
On a sunday afternoon.
It makes ’em rather angry,
grooming them pm,
but if you simple must my dear,
Calm them with m&m’s
The chocolate makes them sleepy,
Their eyes do wilt and droop,
But have some plastic bags ready,
For picking up the poop.
There’s nowt like goomin poodles,
Especially PC repair,
I know sod all about that,
But loads on Poodle Hair!
The morale of this tale,
is not for me to say.
But its the end, go on now leave
and shout Hip hip hooray!
June 12th, 2006
I have invented a new saying whilst drunk, to myself not by myself, because noone would have understood, and it goes a little something like this:
“I’m as heterosexual as white bread!” 😛
June 11th, 2006
This is ace!
June 10th, 2006
What do we all think of Jerry Loinsford’s appeal? Isn’t it a worthwhile cause?
June 9th, 2006
Today at 11am I put my pen down. I had spent 90 minutes writing the responses to two questions. The topic was M335 Media Geographies, but that was not the important issue. Oh no.
At 11am I put my pen down at the end of my final exam.
I am no longer a student. Now, I am officially unemployed!
Actually that’s not true, I’m now a graduand – someone waiting to graduate. But it’s close enough in my book because nobody knows what graduand means, let alone how to spell it.
June 8th, 2006
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