Budding Nick Parks
Looky looky, join Mr Worm on his adventures…… (it’s best with sound)
CLICK HERE
6 comments November 20th, 2006 Sarah
Aren’t I Great
I was just thinking…. “aren’t I great” and then i thought… “Yes, yes I am”.
So I thought i’d come on here and share that thought with you, my bestest friends in the world, after the missus (kate) of course! But she was busy, out buying talc in small bags or something, beats me!
Anyway, back to me. I think that I am possibly the best musician since.. erm.. John Lennon, now that dude could thrust some good loinage! Add to that the fact that I’m so good looking and have a great bird and you think I’m ace, That makes me pretty much the bestest man ever.
peace.
4 comments November 17th, 2006 Pete Doherty
More clear company names
Following on from our previous exploration of this topic, today I passed this outlet in Leeds Market:
Kelly’s Kitchen
At first it seems great, but not so. It clearly explains that this is the Kitchen owned by Kelly, but why? Does she sell of chunks of it to the public? Is it actually just her own personal kitchen that she installed in a unit in the market so she can access it in a convenient city centre location?
As far as I can tell she sells butties and hot breakfasts. What should it be called?
4 comments November 15th, 2006 Chris
Locker Check – Number 29
Date: 14th November 2006
Time: 12:30
Location: The Baltic, Gateshead (give or take)
Given the circumstances of the last “visit” and the sting operation that was put in place I decided to bring in more muscle in case things for sticky. Enter Weddle! We pretended to look at some of the exhibits and then when the coast was clear I made a dash for the locker, chucked in a chocolate biscuit in a foil wrapper (as I wasn’t in possession fo anything else) and walked out as though nothing was wrong. This time there were no security thugs or bints on chairs. It was plain sailing baby! Just a shame I didn’t have any of Mackshall’s tat to put in but don’t worry Christa will find her place there I assure you.
6 comments November 14th, 2006 Ian
Funny Pandas
Taken from the Metro yesterday:
“A PANDA is to get sex education classes at a Thai zoo. Chuang Chuang, a six-year-old male, will be shown ‘panda porn’ to try to get him to breed with Lin Hui. ‘They don’t know how to mate, so we need to show him how,’ a spokesman said.”
Priceless!
2 comments November 14th, 2006 Ian
How to fool someone (if they’re a man)
It’s very simple (I just thought it up). All you do is you say:
When was the last time you got your knob out in public?
Their look will probably be of disgust and they will deny all knowledge of ever doing such a thing. Then you look smug and say:
So your trousers must be quite wet then? 😀
Then you laugh and walk away because you’re cleverer than them and it’ll take them a while to work out what’s the beef. Ha! One in the eye for me. Try it on tards!
3 comments October 31st, 2006 Ian
Proper Company Names
Following on from the recent discussion with Marshall about company names, whereby we decided a proper company name must contain:
1. The person’s christian name
2. What the company does
In order to fully comply with our standards I have sought and found one that may rival ‘John’s Replacement Windows’ in the obvious stakes. Yesterday on the back of a bus I noticed an advertisement for ‘Gary Hall – Windows, Doors and Conservatories’. Now this almost beats John were it not for the fact that Gary Hall doesn’t say what he does with the windows, doors and conservatories. I mean he could easily use them to service cars or chase bears away from picnic grounds… it just blows my mind. If Gary had taken a little more time with it he could have reached John’s level but unfortunately he just falls short. Nevermind
4 comments October 31st, 2006 Ian
The Eye of Knowledge
Behold the magical Eye of Knowledge and have your questions answered.
Exclusive to PouringBeans! Get it now while stocks last!
Continue Reading 13 comments October 30th, 2006 Chris
Doody! Doody! Doody!
Kev, obviously you know what this word signifies/means because you used to say it a lot when we’d be doing random shit for constantly falling. I’ve asked four people here today what doody means and if they’ve every heard of it and NONE of them (three Newcastle, one Middlesbrough) knew about it! :O Am I missing something here?
Marshall? Sarah? Do you know of doody? :O
4 comments October 30th, 2006 Ian