Fishy Encounter
This is my quick attempt, if only to get a mere clap 🙂 Please clap, please, it took me, oooo, 5 minutes of my life!
3 comments October 27th, 2006 Sarah
The Gallery
After much anticipation the next “World Exclusive” has arrived on PouringBeans.com
Marvel in its wonderous masterpieces, then get bored and go get some nachos… I dares ya.
6 comments October 27th, 2006 Kevil
How many badgers…
Q. How many badgers would it take to support the Empire State Building?
A. The Empire State building weights 331,818 tonnes. The average weight of an adult European badger is 11kg. So, according to Newton’s third law, you would need 30,102,040 badgers.
Start rounding them up! 🙂
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6 comments October 27th, 2006 Ian
A Brief Discussion – who should be ‘Silly Bint of the Month for November’?
Order! Order!
I wish to call upon the other gentlemen to advise accordingly on the proposed matter as stated above. In order to facilitate a fair and organised discussion I throw the affair up in the air and expect fully-rounded replies of a subtle yet thorough nature.
I propose we nominate Madonna for believing that importing a baby was a good idea.
6 comments October 23rd, 2006 Ian
I’m in charge!!
Today there was a bus strike. I knew about this strike but yet was unprepared for the role that was selected for me to handle. The bus came at 8:15am and I got on where I was told not only were they not selling week tickets today and only 50p was required but that the driver wasn’t too sure of the route the bus took. So I was forced to stand at the front with him directing his unsure ass around the many twists and turns of the bus route of the 22.
I could have sent us all over the place but I chose to go the right way. I CHOSE! I WAS IN CHARGE! Gimme power gimme gimme! More more more, now now now, mmmmmm… loin-ripplingly good!
6 comments October 23rd, 2006 Ian
HAG ALERT!
Warning! Loose hags on the prowl! Lock up your valuables!
3 comments October 17th, 2006 Chris
Moses – why he’s better
After Moses had reached adulthood, he went to see how his brethren who were enslaved to the Egyptians were faring. Seeing an Egyptian beating a Hebrew, he killed the Egyptian and hid his body in the sand.
Oh yeah! When did Jesus do anything like that eh?
8 comments October 11th, 2006 Ian
Jiffy Bag Update
I posted a jiffy bag full of shite to Newcastle a while ago now. I demand to know whether it was received intact and whether its contents are now being enjoyed by its intended recipient.
Trouble is, if it’s being returned, there’s only a 50% chance it’ll come to me. There are two return addresses on the envelope, and the other one is “The Pope c/o The Vatican”.
4 comments October 9th, 2006 Chris
Silly Bint of the Month – Katie Melua
I’ve decided to start a new category for all those silly bints that plague our everyday life. This month I have decided to nominate Katie Melua. Why you may ask? Well, not only is she still the blandest of the bland but in an effort to drum up publicity she performed underwater yesterday at some cruddy oil rig. I don’t know about you but if I was a rig worker the last thing I would want is to be stuck all the way down there, in a hot, claustrophobic environment with, “There are nine million bicycles in Bejing…” echoing around the room. Surely that’d be the ideal place to organise a lynching. Noone would know and there are no laws under the sea >:) or is that just me? Then she just flew straight home to London.
What a silly bint.
8 comments October 3rd, 2006 Ian